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| I stand at the water's edge, allowing soft ripples to caress my toes. What if I were to continue forward, allow the water to quietly take charge? Dear Olivia has no idea how weary I've become.
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Unexpectedly, I am assailed with a combination of feelings- yet it is in a retrospective way. I am evaluating 25 years of being a mother, much of it single. It is feelings very similar to the "How will I know" feelings, doubt, mixed with wonder, fear combined with joy, and amazement. It is very much like the hopes and dreams one harbors while innocently believing they own sole responsibility for the success of the life they bring forth. I quickly realized that parenting is all about influence, and gut decisions, and setting examples and my determination NOT to repeat things I objected to in my own upbringing.
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