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For Better or For Worse I just read about a couple who got divorced - the wife didn't like the way her husband brushed his teeth. How incredibly stupid! I'm sure there were other reasons - but the way he brushed his teeth…! She could have left the room. People get divorced over the tiniest things. It seems as if a couple gets into a fight and "OH, well, we can't get along so let's get a divorce." Couples need to realize that marriages are not perfect and never will be. People have fights, sometimes serious fights. They just have to tough it out and stick by each other. My parents have been married for almost 19 years. I thought that seemed like such a long time, but this September my grandparents will be married for fifty years. My grandparents have stayed together through the good and the bad times. They have survived the troubles and joys of raising four kids. When my dad and his siblings were married, my grandma and grandfather were with each other to experience the spoils - their grandchildren. Ten years ago, when my grandma had cancer, my grandfather stayed by her side. When my grandfather had two heart attacks, my grandma was at his side. No matter what obstacles they have had to overcome, they have stood by each other. My grandparents still argue every so often. But, it is never serious or important. Things take on a new meaning and importance when one is seventy years old. If my grandma buys something expensive, that she really doesn't need, my grandfather doesn't make a big deal about it. My grandfather doesn't care if he matches his shirt and pants perfectly, and neither does my grandmother. At their age, little things like that do not matter. My grandfather is the world's worst decision-maker. He cannot make up his mind! One time, when I was staying with them, my grandfather couldn't decide what to make for dinner. My grandma finally yelled, "Tanner, just make the darn spaghetti!" My grandfather told her to shut up. My sister and I cracked up laughing - the fight was so comical. When they yell at each other, it's all in fun. What they say isn't said to hurt each other's feelings. My grandma absolutely loves QVC, a home shopping network. I think she has the telephone number on speed dial. With the Internet, grandma can surf the QVC website while watching the channel at the same time. My grandpa always makes jokes about her buying stuff from QVC. My grandparents can take jokes from each other without getting angry or hurt. For example, my grandparents work in their yard. My grandma plants the flowers and my grandfather does the rest. There is a patch in their yard where there is no grass; so it's just gray dirt. When my grandfather mows the lawn, he still mows right over that patch. My grandma (and everyone else in the family) jokes about him mowing his dirt. A lot of people's wisdom and knowledge comes from the Internet, books and television. Not mine. My grandparents have taught me: love isn't perfect, people aren't perfect. To maintain a great relationship for fifty years, one has to let go of the little things and look at the bigger picture. Is the way that special someone brushes his teeth worth losing many years of memories and experiences yet to come? No. I'm sure there have been times when my grandparents wanted to get divorced, but they didn't. It's a good thing, I wouldn't be writing about what I've learned from them and they would have lost all those experiences that make their life worth living. Elise Tanner attends high school in Atlanta, Georgia. Taking an English class sparked her interested in writing. She has previously published poems and essays in online literary journals and newspapers. |
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